Will What You Do Today - Effect Your Life Tomorrow?

Will what you do today effect your life tomorrow? (kind of sounds like an ad for a financial institution doesn’t it?). This has been the theme in my life as of late. Making an impact. Just yesterday a friend said to me, rather melancholy, “I just don’t feel like what I do matters.” Sometimes it’s hard to grasp that we are making a difference. Especially when we don’t feel it for many years later.

This topic sparked when I came across a familiar face the other day. Couldn’t place it though. Something about him was distinct enough for me to notice. I had indeed met this person before. My gut said university…but it seemed closer than that. Luckily, my colleague knew him so I had an in – to solve this mystery. Conversation unveiled that a few years back, we had been at a mutual gathering, hosted by a mutual friend (ironically titled the ‘6 degrees of separation’ party). True, it was a good enough explanation for the knowing feeling, but I still wasn’t convinced that was where I knew him.

“Did you go to UBC” – I asked. Yes. (ok so that narrows it done somewhat) “Where you in Commerce?” Yes. (ok, I had friends in business, so we were getting closer). “Did you live in residence?” Yes…in a Fraternity. Suddenly, clarity rushed through me like a back chill. Everything came together.

Almost ten years ago at the ripe age of nineteen I began my facilitation career working with the Education Outreach program at UBC. It was a very exciting time. We were a group of passionate students who provided information for healthy living on campus. We were given the opportunity to write and facilitate numerous workshops for residences at UBC. The frat house was my very first client. There were a couple of reasons why I knew I’d never forget that experience 1) It was the first workshop I had ever done and 2) The topic was sexual health. It’s an intimating subject anyway, but to talk about it to a room of fifty guys my own age…

When I brought it up by chance, it was indeed his frat house and he actually remembered the night. We laughed about it, I told him how nervous I was (especially considering the fact they were having a keg party right after). His reply…”Really? Wow you didn’t come across that way at all, you handled yourself really well. I remember that.”

Ten years ago, I recall looking in the mirror right before the workshop somewhat petrified. Why oh why did I have to be doing this workshop, at a frat house?! I’d rather party with these guys then teach safe sex. Mortifying. But I trusted that there was a reason why I was doing what I was doing. If not for them, then at least for me. I knew that if I could get through that, there wasn’t much I couldn’t do. Speaking in public got a lot easier after that night; it shocked embarrassment right out of my system. What you do today does matter tomorrow. Even if takes ten years to figure that out. It may not always feel that way in the moment, but in the end it all means something.

Relationships - The hottest topic out there?

Relationships. This is what life is really about. Maybe that is why the pursuit for “relationship” is one of the hottest topics out there. The market for relationship seekers is everywhere – magazines, TV, heck even online is dating. Unless you’ve been living in a cave (not the mars cave that Mr. Grey so delicately taught us about), but rather a secluded hole away from society, you’ll notice how concentrated our conscious is on finding love.

Last weekend, while browsing through my personal temple (Chapters), I gravitated towards a particular table labeled ‘relationships”. Intrigued, I checked out the scene…only to find a showcase of new titles, piled overtop one another just screaming for attention. Apparently, even the books were looking for someone to share a relationship with. There seemed to be a common theme happening- “He’s Just Not That Into You: The No Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys”, “It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken: The Smart Girl’s Breakup Buddy”, “Be Honest: You’re Not That Into Him Either: Raise Your Standards and Reach for the Love You Deserve”. Wow. Ok. Is there something us gals aren’t getting? I mean these are statements, not book titles. Has it really come to this? To be so dam blunt, in order for us to actually understand there is something not quite right about our approach.

Perhaps my feelers were a little more sensitive than usual, since I was on route to a wedding - the first of six that I will attend this year. And I question why some people seem to be on par with relationships, while others aren’t? Or maybe it’s because everyone around me seems to be talking about relationships, searching for a love that will change everything.

The thing is we are at a time in our life when we don’t need to be with someone to survive. Independence is a reality. Now, we can actually choose, who we want to be with. And that makes a big difference in how we do things. What we want and what we won’t settle for. So we search.

Louise Hay wrote that love comes when we least expect it. Hunting for love never brings the right partner – it only creates longing and unhappiness. In fact love or the right person comes, when you are actively living, as the person you want to be. Interesting. I asked my friend (recently in love) about this, and he said, Des, unfortunately in life, very few will actually see your true value and worth, so make sure you always do. You are the one thing to always believe in, when you question if there is anything.

At the core, relationship is defined as a particular type of connection existing between people, or having dealings with each other. We have relationships with everything. We have relationships with our family, with our friends, with our work. But most importantly we have a relationship with our self. I guess if you become the person you desire, then really, you are creating the relationship you seek. The relationship with self is one of the harder ones to find. But it is there - I guess you just have to look at the self help table instead.

Relationships - The hottest topic out there?

Relationships. This is what life is really about. Maybe that is why the pursuit for “relationship” is one of the hottest topics out there. The market for relationship seekers is everywhere – magazines, TV, heck even online is dating. Unless you’ve been living in a cave (not the mars cave that Mr. Grey so delicately taught us about), but rather a secluded hole away from society, you’ll notice how concentrated our conscious is on finding love.

Last weekend, while browsing through my personal temple (Chapters), I gravitated towards a particular table labeled ‘relationships”. Intrigued, I checked out the scene…only to find a showcase of new titles, piled overtop one another just screaming for attention. Apparently, even the books were looking for someone to share a relationship with. There seemed to be a common theme happening- “He’s Just Not That Into You: The No Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys”, “It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken: The Smart Girl’s Breakup Buddy”, “Be Honest: You’re Not That Into Him Either: Raise Your Standards and Reach for the Love You Deserve”. Wow. Ok. Is there something us gals aren’t getting? I mean these are statements, not book titles. Has it really come to this? To be so dam blunt, in order for us to actually understand there is something not quite right about our approach.

Perhaps my feelers were a little more sensitive than usual, since I was on route to a wedding - the first of six that I will attend this year. And I question why some people seem to be on par with relationships, while others aren’t? Or maybe it’s because everyone around me seems to be talking about relationships, searching for a love that will change everything.

The thing is we are at a time in our life when we don’t need to be with someone to survive. Independence is a reality. Now, we can actually choose, who we want to be with. And that makes a big difference in how we do things. What we want and what we won’t settle for. So we search.

Louise Hay wrote that love comes when we least expect it. Hunting for love never brings the right partner – it only creates longing and unhappiness. In fact love or the right person comes, when you are actively living, as the person you want to be. Interesting. I asked my friend (recently in love) about this, and he said, Des, unfortunately in life, very few will actually see your true value and worth, so make sure you always do. You are the one thing to always believe in, when you question if there is anything.

At the core, relationship is defined as a particular type of connection existing between people, or having dealings with each other. We have relationships with everything. We have relationships with our family, with our friends, with our work. But most importantly we have a relationship with our self. I guess if you become the person you desire, then really, you are creating the relationship you seek. The relationship with self is one of the harder ones to find. But it is there - I guess you just have to look at the self help table instead.

We Are What We Eat

They say we are what we eat. What exactly does that mean? A group of us were sitting around eating our bagged lunches. In between conversation and chews, someone pulled out a cheese and Wonderbread sandwich. Suddenly one of the guys did a double take; his eyes popped out in disbelief “Is that white bread?!!!! Whoa! That is sooo last decade.” His astonishment was real, but we found it wildly amusing, since, in today’s diet, white bread seems to be the forbidden fruit. Old school snacks immediately became the topic-o-the-hour.

Cheezewhiz on soda crackers (so that when you squished it together the cheese would ooze through the holes), or even better, the little snack packs with the red spread stick, beans and weinies, Mr. Noodle (cooked or raw), Fruit Roll Ups, Zoodles, Sloppy Joes…the list went on and on. Thinking back, no matter how many times my mom wanted to be creative and make real macaroni and cheese (melted cheddar and pasta) – it was never as bright orange as good ol’ Kraft Dinner. And it lacked a certain…flavour that only came from KD. It just wasn’t the same. Those were the days. When eating was unconscious and “simulated” was a food group. When munchies were fun, even though they had no nutritional value what so ever.

Thankfully, my taste buds have evolved. I actually do enjoy a hearty, raw nut, cookie over Chips Ahoy and if I had to pick, I’d choose a fresh fruit smoothie over ice cream any day. Perhaps it’s a part of growing up. Realizing the reason our parents bought trail mix -when what we screaming for-were chips. There is a great difference between foods that give energy, and foods that reap it.

Which is why, now, I seek out goodies that I know my body will thrive on. My mother tried to engrain this in me years ago (she’d hide chunks of tofu in my noodle soup). But I didn’t really catch on until after university, when jugs of raw juice replaced pitchers of beer. The Urban Oasis on Pandosy, is an organic juice bar that blends daily concoctions for what ever your need is– tired, low, hung over (I didn’t say I gave up all my bad habits), there is a magical creation for it all. Unlike coffee, these juices replenish and give your body energy. Vitalize. Rejuvenate. It’s an addiction I am proud of. And the future of juicing goes far beyond cafes. Cherise, owner and juice doctor, has a dream of taking the juice bar to another level. Where raw juices would actually be the drink of choice at dance parties and clubs. Imagine that? People buzzing off their own energy; dizzy from antioxidants versus intoxicants. In addition, she feeds her customers with organic wraps, soups, sandwiches, and baking.

We need to get closer to the root, not farther from it. Nature made food in a certain state for a reason because it was good for us. Along the way, the taste of “real” was taken over by quick fix and convenience. Think about it, if we really are what we eat, I definitely want to be something real with longevity. What do you want to be? It’s your choice, so choose well and find the goods that put value into your body, instead of take it out.